Human Relationship (மனித உறவு)

Inter personnel Relationship ( சக ஊழியரிடம் பழுகுதல்) and

Emotional Intelligence. (உணர்வுசார் நுண்ணறிவு )

If one is incapable of working in a team or live in harmony with society in general, though highly learned, is as bad as an illiterate ignorant person. Some people are highly educated, come out with high qualifications in academics. However, they lack team spirit and are incapable of working in a group. As any task needs the cooperative efforts of many interacting individuals, these people will not be productive and in fact be the cause of disenchantment among the subordinates, peers and the boss. A man who is incapable to be good team member can never become a team leader too. They are as bad as totally ignorant person in terms of their performance as their output would also turn out to be nil. Assessment of EI ( Emotional Intelligence )  of employees in performance rating have gained currency in recent times.

உலகத்தோ டொட்ட ஒழுகல் பலகற்றுங்
கல்லா ரறிவிலா தார். (140)

Ulagaththo Dotta Ozhugal Palakatrung
Kalla Rarivilaa Thaar.


சமூகத்துடன் ஒன்று சேர்ந்து கூடி வாழ இயலாதவர்கள், நங்கு

கற்றிருந்தும் கல்வி அறிவில்லாதவருக்குச் சமமே   

Those who are unable to get along in harmony with society,

though highly learned, are as good as ignorant only.   

Anger Management (சின  கட்டுபாடு)

Self Destruction ( சுய அழிவு) 

Just to save himself at least, one must control anger failing which his anger itself will destroy him. In the course of work, all are confronted with many issues, landing them in situations provoking them to lose their temper. However, It is of paramount importance for everyone to exercise control on his emotions and act with calm and composure. Any hasty act on account of anger can land one in deep trouble and cause irreparable damage to his reputation.

Anger distracts an individual from the main issue. It is termed as temporary madness and decision taken in a fit of anger always turns out to be wrong. Anger in fact, is nothing but manifestation of one’s weakness and of helplessness. One loses his control on his words and acts. His abusive words and violent actions reduce him into an object of ridicule among his colleagues and friends, could also trigger permanent enmity. Gradually he gets isolated from the society as well.

Venting of anger spoils team spirit and demotivates team mates spoiling the healthy ambiance of work place and destroys the motivation of his peers to work with him.

The top management, while evaluating the suitability of a person for higher position, assigns high weightage for maturity and restraint in dealing with highly tricky volatile issues. No boss would like to take a risk of offering a responsible post to a highly volatile person with explosive anger as uncontrolled anger during times of crisis affects decision making. His anger could become a big stumbling block in career advance and sometimes be the cause for one to get fired from the employment itself.

Anger had been found to be the cause of many life threatening diseases like heart attack,blood pressure, nervous break down and mental health in general . Control of anger is a great asset in fostering healthy Inter Personal Relationship. Roger Federer the greatest tennis star and a living legend, during beginning of his career had uncontrollable temper during his formative years and his coach trained him to convert  his negative energy anger to positive energy as focus on the game and rest as we all know is history. He excels in most critical circumstances and never allows anger to affect his concentration. Hence, one must totally desist from anger, which otherwise will destroy him totally. To command respect of his colleagues, subordinates and superiors one has to establish pleasant relationship even under critical circumstances.

தன்னைத்தான் காக்க சினங்காக்க காவாக்கால்
தன்னையே கொல்லும் சினம் (306)
      

Thannaithaan Kakka Sinankakka Kaavaakkaal
Thannaiye Kollum Sinam


தன்னை காப்பாற்றிக் கொள்வதற்காகவாது கோபத்தை அடக்கியாக

வேண்டும்,  தவறினால் அவனையே அக்கோபம் அழித்து விடும்.

To save himself atleast, one must guard against anger;

 if not, his  anger itself will destroy him.           

Ill  Effects of anger ( சினத்தின் துர் விளைவுகள்)

This ‘Kural’  highlights the adverse effect of anger during interaction with superiros and subordinates. If one vents out his anger towards his superiors it will have no effect on his boss,while he is sure to get destroyed in  his career completely. At the same time, if one gets angry with his subordinates, not only it will affect them, it will spoil his good name affecting his good relationship forever. He will loose all cooperation of his mates and can no longer command the respect making his position untenable. Some are good servants (very obedient to the superiors) but bad masters (ill treatment of subordinates). The message here is anger towards anyone is equally destructive.

செல்லா இடத்து சினந்தீது செல்லிடத்தும்
இல்அதனின்  தீய  பிற ( 302 )


Sella Idaththu Sinamtheethu Sellidaththum
Ilathanin Theeya Pira


பலிக்காத இடத்தில் காட்டும் கோபம் தீங்கு விளைவிக்கும் பலிக்கும் இடத்திலோ அதைவிட ஊறு விளவிப்பது எதுவும் இல்லை.

Getting angry with superiors (more powerful) is bad; however nothing could be worse than anger towards vulnerable people liable to get affected.

Anger Strategy (சின  வியூகம்)

Wise men do not exhibit their anger openly when they get hurt by enemy. They keep it in mind and wait for the best opportunity to win over.  The strength of a person is strategy in tackling his adversary. This is very true in corporate politics and need for a long term strategy to beat rivals. In fact, an appearance of matured nonchalance would be very effective as it would throw the rival off guard and leave him guessing about his rival’s further course of action to be taken. Further, it exemplifies the strength of character and superiority over his rival. On the other hand, instant reaction could become wrong or ineffective as no time is available for carefully analyzing the pros and cons of the action.

There is a saying in English that no one should attempt to “win the battle and loose the war”. The  couplet below conveys the same meaning in a positive fashion.

பொள்ளென ஆங்கே புறம்வேரார் காலம்பார்த்து

உள் வேர்ப்பர் ஒள்ளியவர் (487)      

     

Pollena Aange Purmverar Kalampaarththu
Ul Verpar Olliyavar.       
 
 எதிரி தீங்கு செய்தவுடனேயே அறிவுடையவர் தன் கோபத்தை  

 உடனேயே  வெளியே காண்பிக்க மாட்டார். மனதில் அதை நிலை நிருத்தி அவரை  வெல்வதற்கு ஏற்ற தருணத்தை நோக்கிக் காத்திருப்பார்.